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It is Long Covid Awareness Day today. The first of its kind. Like hundreds of thousands of others in this country alone I have been battling with it for 3 straight years. And yes, just as the name says..it has been fucking long and it’s still not over. For some of us it is the war that just won’t end. For most people Covid is almost considered a thing of the past and have moved on but we got left behind. No fault of our own. That’s just the hand we got dealt and we are now trying to negotiate this debilitating condition that forces you to exclude almost everything from your existence.

This photograph was taken on March 15th 2020 whilst I was djing with the missus at the Ned in the City. Covid was already doing its thing and a couple of guests thought it would be funny to wear plague doctor masks. But it wasn’t a joke. The Gov were already urging people to stay at home but Boris dithered and delayed when he should have shut everything down and as a result we were still out working that weekend. On the Monday we woke up and we had it and that was that.

I used to manage a lot of things..careers, creative projects, a non-stop social life, travelling, partying, cultural events..and now I just manage my illness. I had another massive crash in Jan and fell deep back into ‘the hole’ and once again even the most basic things became impossible. Am just starting to emerge from it now and so this never ending game of snakes and ladders continues.

I am more determined than ever to find a way back to living but I have to traverse a minefield to get there..and as the condition affects your ability to cope with physical, mental and emotional tasks (yup that’s everything) it is pretty much impossible to avoid getting blown up along the way. And yet for many of us (and there are many of us…2 million plus in U.K) all this is happening behind closed doors. No-one can see what we are going through.

This awareness day is all about making us feel seen when we feel increasingly invisible. There is no treatment or support available on the NHS and so there is an added sense of abandonment and many don’t even believe it exists which just makes it even more isolating. So if you know anyone dealing with long Covid or any chronic illness that has taken them out of the game, reach out to them, remind them they are still part of the world because most of the time we feel like we aren’t.

Today is also the birthday of my dear departed friend Sid Roberson, I don’t exactly know what age you would be today other than you would be seriously fucking old…still wish you were here tho’ and the world is still a fuck lot duller without you…

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So guess it’s hat week. Please cast your eyes upon this varied collection of different headwear that the good ole people of London town are sporting this winter. What people choose to cover their heads with is often a flagship item to project their very personal fashion style but they also keep heads warm, highly useful in these chilly times. So no human observations or no social commentary this week, just some good ole fashioned visual grouping..to paraphrase a classic…sometimes a hat is just a hat.

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Human connections and disconnections this week.

In isolation we suffer, in closeness we blossom. And the grey area in between when we are technically together but miles apart can be the worst of all.

Out on the street you see function and dysfunction in relationships wherever you go. If you can connect to your fellow humans life can be beautiful, and if you can’t it’s a slog. So it’s always worth trying your hardest because the rewards are great and the alternative is shite.

I do not have much contact with many folk at present because I don’t have the capacity to do so and I can feel the effect it’s having on my wellbeing. Yes, people can be a pain in the arse and some are even toxic and to be avoided but life’s a lot duller without them. Don’t take your nearest and dearest for granted, every connection we have is precious and worth feeding and protecting…

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A few couples today as it’s good ole Valentine’s day. You see a lot of couples these days who dress alike or have somehow synched their looks. Maybe not intentionally but they have sub-consciously mirrored each other, a sure sign of compatibility and contentment. Or maybe they were attracted to one another because they looked alike? A tad narcissistic but whatever floats your boat..I ain’t judging. You have to find love where you can.

I found it and I ain’t ever letting go. My valentine is my lifeline, now and until the end of time..x

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