“MY NEON NOIR NIGHTS – Print series (#MNNN8)

This gallery is dedicated to the glories of Glasto and the insane amount of innovative large scale production that goes into creating what is essentially Disneyland for wasted adults. As you wander around the gi-normous site at night you can barely turn a corner without finding some captivating bit of eye candy which will no doubt keep you occupied for hours whilst derailing you from your intended destination. Hooking up with friends? Going to see your favourite dj? Trying to find a loo that doesn’t look like an alien exploded inside it? No Chance. All plans evaporate into the ether as you indulge your child like curiosity and your adult like intoxication. Glasto is a tripper’s paradise and a highly stimulating sensory experience like no other. Oh, and I think they have some bands there too…

It was obviously greatly missed this year by its regular attendees who swear by it as not only the ultimate festival but the ultimate antidote to regimented sensible city living. And so hopefully these shots will keep the Glasto flame alive in your minds until we can all be there again…

GLASTONBURY 2019 – Day 6 (Sun 30th June)

And so we survived another Glasto. Just about. Hope you enjoyed my skew-whiff vision of Glasto (is there any other kind?) This was MYGLSTO but you can be sure that everyone out of the 200 odd thousand people on site would have had a different one. I have tried to show you a Glastonbury festival that you won’t see on TV. The one away from the main stages. And also to show you that it ain’t for everyone. Not as a warning just in the pursuit of an honest depiction.

And in all honesty I’m not even sure if it’s still for me. I have slightly lost the desire to dealing with crowds of that size and as there is more of a sheep mentality now at Glasto (see rabbit hole q for perfect example) which creates giant walking dead style herds of festival zombies lurching from main act to main act rather than venturing off the beaten track, it can become overwhelming. And having just read that they’ve had approval to increase capacity by another 20,000 that kinda puts the fear in me.

I also felt this year there was a lack of mixing between the multitude of sub-genres and musical tribes present. I liked that everyone moved between worlds but people tend to stay more in their respective camps these days. The ravers, the rock heads, the popsters, the hippies, the vaudevillians, the bucket list baby boomers, the poshos, the locals, the workers, the middle class munters..these independent worlds have always existed at Glasto but it felt like there used to be more crossover between them which for me was the best thing as you got to speak and hang out with folk from different bubbles to your own. I also judge a festival on the quality of the stop and chats and I would have to say it was definitely down on previous years. But that could have been me. I gotta feel it and I guess I wasn’t.

This year was in some ways one of the easiest (no rain, no mud, tent with shade, wangled an on-site vehicle pass) but also one of the toughest. Having been to a few smaller festivals of late which are all the fun, none of the aggro, it felt like a slog. We were slightly battered on arrival (after an unintentional run of nights in the lead up to the festival – textbook error) which meant we were maybe a bit jaded and too weary to deal with such a humungous event.

And without wishing to end on a downer (but I feel it would be disingenuous to not mention) I am also finding it very difficult these days to party with carefree abandon with the looming climate apocalypse lurking over us. Its a proper buzzkill and finding it harder and harder to shut it out and keep pretending all is well when it clearly isn’t. I just feel we need to put everything on hiatus until we sort out this shit show. Glasto should be a celebration of life but I just don’t feel like there is much worth celebrating right now. We need to take action not fuck around with frivolities. At least till this mother of all messes is dealt with. And yes, it was great they banned plastic bottles this year but that is a drop in the ocean (pun obvs intended) to what needs to be done.

And I think deep down it is having an effect on everyone but its the ‘elephant in the field’ no-one is really willing to discuss. And no amount of intoxicating substances can wash away the feeling that we are ignoring impending doom. If it is an emergency, which has been proven unequivocally, why aren’t we still not acting like its one? Why are we still doing all this shit? I love dancing in fields to great music whilst hugging strangers as much as the next festival go’er but maybe this isn’t the time? Just sayin…

    GLASTONBURY 2019 – Day 4 (Fri 28th June)

    We marched all over site on Friday and even though it had seemed packed uptil that point the crowds seemed to have doubled since the day before. Dealing with the mob in downtown Glasto (around the main stages) is pretty full on and not for the feint hearted. It’s a slog and you see lots of people who seem completely overwhelmed by the scale of it all and the amount of folk they have to fend through to get to their chosen destination. This is the bit they do not see on the TV.

    Every time I mentioned that I was going to Glasto or that have just been to Glasto, the response is always the same…”Oh, I’ ve always wanted to go there. I would like to see it, just once”. It has become one of those bucket list things like the northern lights or Machu Picchu. IT is now something everyone wants to experience but it is definitely not for everyone. Not at all. It is an extreme event, an endurance test and ideally you need to be pretty wasted pretty much all of the time to deal with it.

    Glasto used to be full of mostly munters and musos, party people who are willing to do what is necessary. These days you tend to get a lot more tourists who are there to see the spectacle rather than necessarily participate in it in this way. This has changed the feel of the festival considerably and it now feels different to how it did. Not that anyone doesn’t deserve to be there or can’t do it how they want to do it. Glasto should be anything but exclusive, everyone is welcome but it has altered the vibe.

    it used to be mainly heavy duty hedonists that was attracted to Glasto which created a certain atmosphere. In the current era, pretty much everyone and their grandma now want to go to Glasto. So as a result, it sells out in half an hour so it basically boils down to who has the fastest broadband is who gets to go.

    Its not about it getting more commercial because it had to move with the times and think that Emily Eavis has done a magnificent job of transforming it and making it relevant to a new generation by diversifying the acts which has successfully diversified the crowd. It needed to evolve to survive but it has also diluted the Glastonbury spirit, in my opinion and in my experience there. And I will come back to this concept of personal perspective and projection in my final Glasto post on Sat…(bonus blog day so I could cram it all in, aren’t you lucky?)

    After our massive trek across site we came back to the Bimble Inn and had the best time out of anywhere we had been so decided we were going to park up in the Park (park pun intended) and have our fun without the aggro of having to get to it in the first place. This is often my policy in my home town and Glasto is actually a lot like London. Its massive and not just one place, its lots and lots of places sandwiched together and sometimes the best thing you can do is stay local and enjoy what is on offer on your doorstep…

    GLASTONBURY 2019 – Day 3 (Thurs 27th June)

    By the time Thursday came along everything was in full swing, although so much had already happened I felt like I had been there a week and could barely remember anything before arriving on site..I was sure I used to have a life before Glasto, I just couldn’t quite recall what it was. The festival is so friggin enormous (the size of Sunderland apparently) and so all encompassing you forget there is anything beyond its walls…

    New arrivals getting stuck in at The Bimble Inn, which was our favourite venue on site…great vibe, great bands. It is up on the hill in the ParK Area behind the big ribbon tower so people who are willing & wanting to steer away from the masses come here because they know there is a ton of fun to be had off the heavily beaten tracks of the main areas.

    If you want to see your favourite band best get there early.

    One crucial thing we learnt very early on and from previous years…if you see a crowd heading somewhere en masse go in the opposite direction and you can’t go far wrong. At normal festivals you would do the opposite but at Glasto there is so much cool shit to see it really doesn’t matter where you are. You do not need or want to follow the hoards. You wanna basically zig when they zag. Not everyone realises this as there are so many first timers who don’t really know where to go and you could see them marching around looking for the party not realising that they ARE the party. You make the fun wherever you are not where you were told to go. You have to be adventurous and explore. Glasto rewards the brave and the bold.

    But sometimes you just can’t avoid ’em. Glasto has the same sized population as Iceland (the country not the supermarket altho apparently there was a supermarket on site selling sarnies in biodegradable packaging but we never found it) there were times when staying away from the crowd wasn’t possible. On Thursday the site was already rammed with folk there but none of the stages open till the following day so the whole site descends on block 9, unfair playground and Shangri-la, the late night venues scattered across the top end.

    Block 9 – just like the apocalypse, but with mebbe less cannibalism and with mebbe more massive sound systems, amazing light shows and munted ravers…

    Meet you by the guy with the big sword..

    This is Icon the new stage which looked like a cross between 1984 & 2001. The movies not the years..although by the way a lot of the ravers were dressed you would have thought it was 1989 not 2019.

    Meanwhile in the Rocket Lounge, vintage vibes rocked & rolled em…

    Went to see our friend Gus aka Lazlo legezer in the early hours play a superb drum n bass set in the giant mouth tent (don’t know name) in the Unfair playground that had ’em spinin’ out…

    ok, caption comp..the fella on the right has clearly said somit that didn’t go down too well with the girl on left. Please send your entries to babycakesromero@gmail.com and the winner will get a lifetime subscription to my blog…

    On the way home we stumbled upon this gang. The girl on right was mc’ing really quite badly to a makeshift sound system in a shopping trolley pumping out D&B but we cheered her on cos that is the Glasto spirit. its all about supporting & rewarding effort…

    We even managed to pop to the seaside on the way back, visiting Glastonbury on Sea: a giant seaside pier built out of steel. ‘Nuff said.

    Back in the pod, the lucky folk who had bagged it were settling in for the night. Made mental note to try again next night..

    You might have noticed by this point that all my pictures are mostly blurred with whacked out trippy light swirly affairs. All I can say is this is what my camera captured. The colours you see are the way it came out. The odd thing is that is mostly how it looked to me at the time. My retinas seem somehow, quite inexplicably, to be able to relay the information they are processing directly into my shutter – how that is possible I know not but am very happy my equipment and my warped sensory perception have this symbiotic connection. The ultimate fusion of man & machine. Or just a shaky hand with a long exposure. I prefer the first theory personally…

    Tomorrow’s episode: Friday! When the festival actually officially begins and bands you have heard of start to play. The likes of which I fail to see as am ensconced elsewhere. People who watch Glasto on Tv can’t really comprehend that what they see is only a fraction of the festival, and in my opinion, not the best bit about it all. The greatest thing about Glasto is all the little tents, the bands and djs you have never heard of, the ones you stumble upon by accident…the ones you will never know their name but you will remember the moment forever…possibly. Ok, unlikely, but you lived it and that’s the main thing, right?

    GLASTONBURY 2019 – Day 2 (wed 26th June)

    Thursday used to be the warm up day for the festival. Then the warm up day got its own warm up day and now Wednesday is a big day in its own right. At this rate people are going to start coming for their 2 week summer holiday ..but that won’t work because you would then need a 2 week holiday to recover..

    Annoyingly they weren’t there. Typical Glasto meet up.

    Devices at the ready…we’re goin in.

    This festival go’er was lost & trying to find the location of her temporary dwellings after having pulled an all-nighter. She had taken a photo of a nearby stage the night before so she would be able to find but it wasn’t helping. There are apparently tons of tents which are found at the end of the festival which are full of unpacked bags where Gglastoheads have arrived, dumped their stuff, gone out that night, and then never managed to find their tent again for the rest of fest due to having successfully failed to secure their whereabouts before going off and getting wasted. Ouch

    Cinemaggedon – an incredible collection of sooped up vintage cars n hotrods to hang in at the drive-in whilst you watch you a movie…

    ..or use to catch up on some kip.

    Fatboy Slim turned up and performed a ‘not so secret’ silent disco set as the film rolled. Crowd went suitably nuts..

     

    Incredible pod thing you could hang out in a la Park. Made mental note to return and utilise but subsequently forgot to check mental notes so never managed to actually get in…

    Kicking off at the deluxe diner.

    Standing up for alien rights…

    ..and it was great to see so many unicorns at Glasto this year, diversity really improving, although think orc numbers could still be improved..

    Just in case crowd got lairy…

    Drum n bass was back big time all over site this year..just like it never went away. #90stakeover2019

    One day of rubbish…

     

    GLASTONBURY 2019 – Day 1 (tues 25th June)

    We arrived at Worthy Farm on Tuesday afternoon and sailed in. Well, we drove in actually, we weren’t in a boat. The hoards wouldn’t arrive till tomorrow so we were able to get on site easily and get our tent pitched up on the hill overlooking the Park area next to a tree. This turned out to be the greatest move we ever made as it meant we had shade every morning till midday which was a first. When its hot at a festival you normally have to vacate your tent by 8am as it becomes nuclear by then. By getting several hours kip in each night (well, each morning) meant we were able to give our bodies ‘n’ brains some rest which allowed us (just about) to get through an insanely full-on week of revelling in the biggest musical festival on the planet…

    Rule No.1 – pack light.

    Dr. Zoidberg warmly greeted us into the festival..

    Glasto gets poolitcal. (one bad pun surely deserves another?)

    Glasto tourists wait for the big crane at Arcadia to burst out its fireballs.

    Clearly every crowd was catered for at Glasto…

    The Unfair playground

    On the first night we went to the crew bar at Shangri-la and it was going off. On a tuesday! Everyone was already flying high and raving hard. It was kicking off more than most festival at their peak. You realise that Glasto is actually a crew party, the punters are just along for the ride…and pay for it. There are around 50,000 people working at the festival and by the time the festival starts they have been going at it for about two weeks. It is their contribution and dedication to partying which makes Glasto begin in full swing at full tilt with no run up…

    This guy above was jumping up and down repeatedly into a bin so that he could crush the cans inside. We never found out quite why unless he was just being duly diligent…or had a thing about cans. Or bins.

    We found out on arrival that the whole of the festival was being used as a 5g testing site. No choice. No consent. This did not feel me with joy. More of that later on in week…

    We saw many casualties even on the first night. At Glasto no-one knows how to hold back. It just isn’t an option.

    Eco Car

    This was a sculpture of a turtle that had been caught up in a ton of plastic and other human waste items. It was designed so you could hang out inside of it but highlighted the damage we are causing to the oceans and its inhabitants, which to be honest, was a bit of a buzz kill (laughing face with tears, crying face with tears)

    The view from our tent

     

    To be continued….

    #MYGLSTO ’15

    Me and my camera on the festival circuit, my adult playground, my Glastonbury

    MYGLSTO '15

    #MYGLSTO (05)

    Me and my camera in someone else’s field, my festival season, my glastonbury  

    despacioboothball

    To see the full Glasto Gallery please click here

    I did spend most of my Glasto at Despacio mainly for the simple reason it was “The best party at the best party in the world” ©. The council shut it down early on Saturday  due to sound levels as apparently there was “too much wattage” – the atmosphere was electric so I guess that’s what did it?!  It was absolutely gut wrenching for everyone there who were literally having the time of their lives and for the sleeping neighbours they were undoubtedly none the wiser that 800 people had their hearts broken in the flick of a switch. 

    Every minute on the Despacio floor is to be cherished and with 80 precious minutes still to go and the ultimate building crescendo finale taken away from us, we all stood there in total shock as the lights went up. Faces of joy turned to faces of horror. It was as if our still beating hearts had been ripped out by the freaky voodoo guy in Indiana Jones 2. Overly dramatic? If you were there you know I am not exaggerating. What killed even more was rather than hug all my new random dance floor best friends and celebrate that we had all been at “The best party at the best party in the world” © (yes I am trying to make T.B.P.A.T.B.P.I.T.W happen)  we all just sloped off into the night knowing that everything would be a massive drop down by comparison. And it was.

    Overall though Glasto 14 was a killer from start to finish. Immense fun throughout. Yes, its total carnage. Battling with mud and tents and 200,000 people (mostly off their faces) in a massive temporary town with slightly unsavoury facilities but it is oh so worth it. Glasto knocks the pathetic prissy city dweller out of you and drops your standards to zero and below and soon enough you’re covered in crap and you just don’t care. Roll on 2015!

    #MYGLSTO (04)

    Me and my camera in someone else’s field, my festival season, my glastonbury 

    despaciobcrbury-13

    This was taken at the umm…well,ok, I don’t have an exact location for this one either – does it really matter where it was taken? It was at Glasto, that’s all you need to know. They don’t seem to know where they are either so its ok really…

    #MYGLSTO (03)

    Me and my camera in someone else’s field, my festival season, my glastonbury 

    despaciobcrbury-16

    In all honesty I don’t really remember taking this shot or where exactly it was or when for that matter but as the saying goes…if you remember Glastonbury you weren’t really there…anyway who needs a memory? That’s what photographs are for right? To fill in the gaps…I read recently that you actually have much less chance of remembering an event if you take a photo as the brain assumes its been taken care of  and doesn’t bother storing it…which  I guess is what happened in this instance…and all the other instances I can’t recall…

    #MYGLSTO (02)

    Me and my camera in someone else’s field, my festival season, my glastonbury  despaciobcrbury-7

    Despacio opened its doors (i know tents don’t really have doors but go with it) in the Silver Hayes area on Thursday at 8pm. There was already a massive queue to get in  and it was at capacity within minutes. The rest then queued from that moment on to the moment it closed. Those who made it in will  know it was  worth the wait…and some.