Some pictures from deep within the vault this week…why? Well folks, this is not only my 1800th post but the MYLDN blog has been going for 10 years! I’ve been doing it so long I’m not even sure blogs are still a thing but here we are.
I initially thought I would do it for a year. (Get the photo now?) Always liked annual project. The idea was to have a platform to share and showcase all these photos I didn’t know what to do with that I’d taken as wandered around this never dull city. But what I hadn’t anticipated was how much productivity it would generate. It gave me purpose and focus and improved my skills and is still doing so to this day.
Each week a theme materialised almost by magic as my photos somehow connected to what was going on in the world at the time. There were many wrongs to right and indeed write about and coupled with the fact that I have never been short of an opinion always meant I had something to rant about come each Friday.
The world itself has changed a truckload since I started…sadly not for the better (environmental collapse, Brexit, Trump, wealth disparity, digital fuelled narcissism) and the saddest thing is the one thing that should’ve changed is that those tory fuckwits are still in power, still fucking shit up, still not giving a shit.
I have had to step away from the political spectrum for my own sanity and health but no matter what was going on in my life I kept taking photos and carried on. Even whilst being ill over the last three years I kept it going (albeit with a few lil breaks in transmission) because the truth is this is how I connect to other human beings. Especially at the moment so it’s very precious to me. It’s difficult to know sometimes if anyone’s paying attention but I know some of you have been with me since the beginning and it’s great to still have you on board.
But even if no-one was looking I would still be doing this because I have a compulsion to document the world around me. I am addicted to capture those tiny little moments amidst the drudgery of day to day living that would otherwise be lost in the ether forever. And I’m not sure that is ever going to go away.
Am I gonna keep going for another ten years? Or more? Who da fuck knows? I am still trying to work through all the photographs I have taken. Even if I never took another I still think I have enough shots in the archive to keep this ship sailing till I sink. Now is that a threat or a promise I hear you say?
Sandwiched somewhere amongst the headlines this week was the scientist’s final warning on climate change to the leaders of the world: act now or it’s too late. For decades they have been saying “before it’s too late” and now we are almost at the moment when there is no before..it’s just too late. Was this information greeted with alarm or urgency? Did they drop everything and leap into action? Ehh, not so much.
Most people barely noticed it. It got lost in the noise like everything else. And politicians certainly didn’t flag it up. And so there it is..facing a threat to our very existence the human race simply ignored it and went about their business. And we so limp towards this calamitous destiny ..not with a bang or even a whimper..just with a collective shrug of indifference…and possibly with just the vaguest hope in the back of our minds that some sort of miracle will somehow save the day..although none of us exactly know what that might be..a superhero possibly? Godzilla? The climate fairy? Who’s going to be our knight in shining armour? It certainly ain’t gonna be anyone in power cos they would’ve stepped up by now. So who? Actually the messiah is apparently due for a return so maybe we’ll be ok after all…let’s go with that..
Monochromatic tributes to people who have died this week. I know a lot of people can’t handle the death thing but it is in fact the only guaranteed part of life. It seems strange to ignore it completely. And yet we all stumble on as if it’s never going to happen when we know for a fact that it is. It’s a bit like recycling. We know it isn’t really being done but we still do it anyway.
And so even though it happens every day we are always surprised and shocked to hear when someone has died. Even if you didn’t know them that well. And if you knew them and cared for them and loved them it is beyond brutal and the hole they leave behind will never truly be filled. But if you have lost it means you have loved which means you have truly lived.
And in some ways the beautiful thing about life is that it continues no matter what whether you are in it or not. New lives, new dreams, new everything…constantly evolving, adapting, growing…as each and every living thing on this planet works their arse off to survive and to thrive and flourish.
I was going to use the shots this week to make a comparison to my own current situation (no I haven’t died, it just kinda feels like it) but after banging on about it on Wednesday for Long Covid Awareness day I think I’ve probably said enough about all that for now.
So I will just leave you with this picture of me (taken by my mum) which I was going to use to illustrate me clinging on for dear life..and I guess it still does.
Steve Mackey tragically passed away last week. I met him when I was hired as a production photographer on a couple of music video shoots he was directing alongside Douglas Hart. As a massive Pulp fan I was delighted to be working with him and they say you should never meet your heroes but he was the loveliest man you could imagine. And he was also ridiculously talented and the ultimate renaissance man.
Pictured here with Sworn Virgins on their Searching for Hiro video.
I have been playing the album Separations by Pulp every day since I heard the sad news. It was the record Steve joined the band on and it took them in a new direction, introducing the electronic element to their sound. It is a superb album and have got completely and utterly immersed in it. They were still relatively unknown when they made it and it was not one I had really heard before as joined them on his n hers like most other people. It was actually recorded in 89 but not released till 92 and for me is a true undiscovered gem and think it truly deserves to stand alongside the records that followed.
James Righton shoot for Release Party
Steve will most definitely live on in his music and his photography and his films but also in the hearts and minds of everyone who knew him. My deepest condolences go out to his family.
It is Long Covid Awareness Day today. The first of its kind. Like hundreds of thousands of others in this country alone I have been battling with it for 3 straight years. And yes, just as the name says..it has been fucking long and it’s still not over. For some of us it is the war that just won’t end. For most people Covid is almost considered a thing of the past and have moved on but we got left behind. No fault of our own. That’s just the hand we got dealt and we are now trying to negotiate this debilitating condition that forces you to exclude almost everything from your existence.
This photograph was taken on March 15th 2020 whilst I was djing with the missus at the Ned in the City. Covid was already doing its thing and a couple of guests thought it would be funny to wear plague doctor masks. But it wasn’t a joke. The Gov were already urging people to stay at home but Boris dithered and delayed when he should have shut everything down and as a result we were still out working that weekend. On the Monday we woke up and we had it and that was that.
I used to manage a lot of things..careers, creative projects, a non-stop social life, travelling, partying, cultural events..and now I just manage my illness. I had another massive crash in Jan and fell deep back into ‘the hole’ and once again even the most basic things became impossible. Am just starting to emerge from it now and so this never ending game of snakes and ladders continues.
I am more determined than ever to find a way back to living but I have to traverse a minefield to get there..and as the condition affects your ability to cope with physical, mental and emotional tasks (yup that’s everything) it is pretty much impossible to avoid getting blown up along the way. And yet for many of us (and there are many of us…2 million plus in U.K) all this is happening behind closed doors. No-one can see what we are going through.
This awareness day is all about making us feel seen when we feel increasingly invisible. There is no treatment or support available on the NHS and so there is an added sense of abandonment and many don’t even believe it exists which just makes it even more isolating. So if you know anyone dealing with long Covid or any chronic illness that has taken them out of the game, reach out to them, remind them they are still part of the world because most of the time we feel like we aren’t.
Today is also the birthday of my dear departed friend Sid Roberson, I don’t exactly know what age you would be today other than you would be seriously fucking old…still wish you were here tho’ and the world is still a fuck lot duller without you…
